This man's got something to tell you, people. He is creative, almost romantic, versatile. He can master the art of speech and writing, without taking up too much of the limelight. He seeks to define his own political stand (liberal, but my ex-Maltese teacher, Mark Vella, says no).

He analyses without dissecting, doesn't exaggerate with the nitty gritty and gets you hooked to his writing almost instantly. His down to earth manner is reflected in his writing, the word bombastic isn't in his vocabulary, because it's the last priority and simply doesn't fit in.

Pierre Mejlak is Gozitan, but could easily be a citizen of the world. He is in Brussels right now, working as translator, in a city that hosts what looks like an active Maltese hive. God bless the EU, it has had the side effect of draining Malta of some of the best brains. Pierre would have still made the grade, though, for his intellect and vision extend his range of abilities from the fields of contemporary life to sport, to travel, to current affairs, to history. His Maltese writings are simply brilliant, simple yet striking in their format.

And he also acknowledges that Toni Sant is a little stramb.

Meeting Pierre
Pierre Mejlak and Wayne Flask met on Campus, in 2001 whereabouts. B.Communications both of us, Pierre was one of four or five Gozitans who used to do the trip from the sister island, every morning, rain or shine, to attend the 8am lecture in Methods of Inquiry. He used to sit down and shut up, talk when prompted (much unlike my loud cino/sarcasm) with remarked intelligence and tidy mannerisms.

By time I discovered he was a Benigni fan, I had joined Calypso FM from the satellite (as in a parent and child relationship, not technically speaking) studio in Baystreet. It was a small studio, manned by a young DJ with oh-so many songs to play and an intellectual depth to prove.

From the other side, up until 5pm, Pierre Mejlak used the host Calypso's Sunday drive, well aware of what to play and that his show ended at 5pm. The other "colleagues" weren't that correct.

I was always amazed at has inventive. People also took notice of it, references kept pouring in and so did new opportunities. Remarkably, he was the BBC's correspondent in Malta when the Siamese Twins' issue erupted, and I also remember seeing him buzzing around the Ta' Qali counting hall, pen and paper jotting down the total votes garnered by Arrigo, R. on the Sliema district.

Since I ran out of words, the man himself is going to finish off this article. Meanwhile, I will sip the 3rd coffee of the day (it is 13.36pm in Malta).

* * *
Geneva, 2042.

"Pierre J. Mejlak is receiving the Nobel for Literature. With his white, cleanly trimmed beard, you could see Braun's trimmers have worked wonders on him. And then there's his white staff, which he bought from eBay a good thirty years ago. Legend has it this staff was once owned by a Maltese revolutionary who met an untimely brutal end, devoured by a number of illegal immigrants, in Birzebbuga.

Pierre's wife is helping him up to the stage. Despite her age, and her wrinkes, she could still radiate a rare, mystic beauty.

The audience burst into a long round of applause as Mejlak collected his trophy. In the first row, the top brass seating included the President of the Gozitan Republic, Dr Duncan Debono (a nephew of what was, thirty years earlier, the Minister of the Gozo) and all the ministers of the Gozitan Cabinet (since, in 2012, an oil well was discovered in Ghasri and the island was led through a harsh battle for independence by a number of entrepreneurs known as the Big Bellies. The Maltese government had then granted independence on the proviso that Gozo would export three tons of Gbejnjiet tal-Bzar yearly to Malta.)

The new Gozitan government had then built a power plant in Xlendi and obtained complete freedom from Maltese ties when the last policemen were sent back to the "main island" after their last shift in the Victoria Police Precinct. Meanwhile, the ageing writer, Mejlak, was asked to draft the first Gozitan constitution.

Claiming inspiration from the Bible, the Koran, the guru Granth Sahib of the Shiite faction and the teachings of Prince Buddha, Mejlak drew up a constitution whose elegance he compared to his mother in law, Laetitia Casta. An Italian critic had also compared it to Asia Argento's stare, the same that had drowned Mejlak into a serious psychosexual crisis out which, as he acknowledged, he had never come clean.

The Constitution was immediately translated in 75 languages and processed into a microchip that NASA shipped off to space during Mission Mugabe - the enormous planet close to Saturn that nobody had ever noticed because - it was really enormous.

Back to ourselves, in Geneva. At the back of the hall, Wayne Flask's presence couldn't go by unnoticed. Flask, known as El Apostata, had spent the last 30 years in a Brazilian jail after having plunged the whole country in deep crisis because of the ideas he had spread on the beaches of Leblon and Ipanema. He was eventually freed and scuttled back to Europe.

And, watching Mejlak receiving the medal with Alfred Nobel's face sculpted on the front, teardrops rolled silently down Flask's weary cheeks."

Visit Pierre Mejlak's blog on www.maltamedia.net/pjm

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